Tag Archives: love

Yours and Mine :)

1 Jan

It’s 2017! We are given another year for fresh beginnings – a clean slate, a blank paper to write a new chapter of our lives on. All the baggage we have from 2016 are better off left exactly there – in the past. Let’s all start the new year right – filled with joy, fulfillment, gratitude, awe, faith and love. 🙂 And hurray for me! I have a new blog post on the first day of 2017! Setting the momentum for what’s gonna be a good year not only for me, but also for this blog. hehe 🙂

I was going through my piled-up drafts and thought this number right here with the white clean coat dress and well-polished look was the most befitting to welcome the new year:  p_20161225_103725_bfIt’s simple, crisp, clean,  kinda mature, and subtly presidential. Nothing too grand or flamboyant, but still making a statement. 🙂 That’s how I probably would describe what I want for my 2017 – I want it to be a concoction of simple joys, responsible adulting and small wins in life. Of course, I wouldn’t say no to great surprises, such as maybe passing or topping the bar exams but I shouldn’t really get myself caught up with the big deals lest I allow pressure to take over me. That is the last thing I want for 2017:)

p_20161225_103721_bfAnyways, I’ve been trying to recollect the best memories of my 2016 and you know what I realized?  The past year has had too many highlights that I cannot even call them highlights anymore. LOL :)) 2016 has been super awesome. It was a collection of colorful experiences which are not necessarily always happy and good; Indeed, some made me tremble, shed tears, and doubt myself for a bit but in the end, it’s what made things pretty interesting.

p_20161225_103858_bf_1Here are some of the unforgettable moments of my life in 2016:

1. I graduated from law school. I couldn’t believe it myself – I got through 5 and 1/2 years of what I thought was extreme hell. Wheeeeew! It was not heartbreaks that made me cry like a baby so many times – it was law school! bruuuuuh

2. I was sent to Switzerland along with the other members of the Philippine Delegation to defend a State Report before the United Nations Committee on the Elimination of (all forms of) Discrimination Against Women (UN CEDAW). First travel abroad. Europe. This one will always be in my heart. 🙂

3. I fell in love with the strangest guy, or should I say, strangest idea of a guy. Kakaibang love story to na hindi naman talaga love story. Ah basta. Kailangan ko ng separate post for this lol.

4. I got my first bouquet of roses on Valentines day 🙂 I know, i know. shallow. But then, this blog is called Shallow Euphoria so I’m justified for cherishing this experience just a bit too much right? 😛

5. I got my heart broken 😦 But it was a test of my self-appreciation and self-respect so all good.

6. I became more spiritual. I was learning a lot about Taoism and it has tremendously helped in my daily life.

7. I was introduced to the habit of reading. This one’s the most unexpected but I love that it happened 🙂

8. I made another milestone (which I  cannot disclose right now) just before the year ends…

9. ….and a lot of food, frappe, cocktails, hotel hopping, family and friends bonding, and alfresco resto exploring in between!!

WHAT AN AMAZING YEAR IT HAS BEEN!

coat-dress1Dress from a thrift shop

recently-updated30Bag gifted by my office mate Becca, Anne Klein watch, gold bangle from Baclaran

p_20161225_103752_bf_1Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, any one can start from now and make a brand new ending.

p_20161225_103740_bfWe are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.

p_20161225_102729shoes from Parisian

p_20161225_103745_bf2016 has taught me so much about myself, about adulthood, and about life in general. I gathered all these important realizations to sort out the things I need to improve on, and while the past year has been nothing short of wonderful, I acknowledge that there are responsibilities I need to take more seriously this year for my own sake. So, after a quick year-end review, this is the set of New Year’s Resolutions I intend to pay attention to:

15740766_1895376467364472_1011165136715892121_nMany of my goals I am already trying/doing, but I feel that I need to improve on the consistency aspect – like reading my novels and devotional/Taoism books, blogging and trying to live a healthier lifestyle.

I also have  one major goal for 2017 and that is to pass TOP the bar exams (libre mangarap, friends! hahaha). But seriously, It’s the one thing from that list I’m kinda nervous about, not because I don’t believe in my own aptitude, but because I know it entails lots lots lots of discipline and hard work. But a new year means infinite possibilities and I intend to try my luck on that ha!  🙂

p_20161225_103934_bf1Before I end this post, allow me to insert one important message:

I know that some people did not have a very pleasant 2016. And I don’t want to dilute the importance of their own experiences just because my year turned out well and fine.  To my friends who breathed a big sigh of relief upon the conclusion of the past year, congratulations for getting through your rough time! 🙂 I am soooo proud of your strength, your endurance and your will to soldier on! I hope that 2017 brings you the blessings that you so deserve. 🙂 This new year can as much be yours as it can be mine. CLAIM IT! 🙂

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HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!!! LET’S SPREAD LOVE WHOLE YEAR ROUND!!!

love,

Janica 🙂

Lavender Fields

9 Apr

I finally love myself. 🙂 That I am sure now. I used to just think that I should start loving myself more. Now I am certain that I already do. I know because I was able to let go of something I’ve always been addicted to but was never healthy for me. For the first time in my life, I genuinely believed that I do deserve better.  Last night, I accepted what is and disillusioned myself from what it could be. It used to be just in my mind you see -being strong and making my own good a priority. Well, I finally can say that I have conclusively made it happen – to choose “me”, to stop settling, to stand my ground when the biting reality comes. That is how I know I have already achieved an important life goal: I now love myself more. 🙂

They said that right decisions are usually the toughest to make. For all the bad and stupid decisions that I made in the recent and not-so-recent past (and trust me, there are so many), I know that the one I made last night was something I’m gonna be most proud of. It was not an easy feat but I did it. It was the culmination of all my efforts to grow and improve myself. And for that I am happy.

bigstock-Stunning-Lavender-Field-Landsc-41183260.jpgNow it is time for a fresh start. Equipped with the right perspective, a smarter mind, and a more dignified heart, I know that I am in for a journey that will finally take me to where I wanna be – a place as opulent and charming as… lavender fields. 🙂  A place to run around free from all ropes of negativity, a paradise where everything is just beautiful and happy and truly meaningful.

Speaking of lavender fields, here is an outfit that is inspired by it:

(ang galing ng segue ko, aminin nyo hahaha)

P_20160324_180944A breezy, summer look that speaks of  quiet glee and pristine calmness. I hope you feel the softness in it, the delicate simplicity of it. Because I do, and I love it 🙂

P_20160324_181001“Life is a paradise for those who love many things with passion”. And out of these many things, the most important of all is ourselves. Loving ourselves with passion is the pinnacle of happiness because while loving other people or things bring enormous joy in our lives,  it is only when we truly love ourselves first can we genuinely love others too. 🙂

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blog29Top and necklace from Landmark, Korean-brand shoes, white shorts gifted by a relative

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I made a personalized journal to remind me of the things that I consider important. I named it my “Dreams and Schemes” notebook because it is where I write down all my hopes and goals and graces in life. The Law of Attraction encourages this kind of hobby. It says that writing down one’s aspirations helps shape one’s frame of mind and way of thinking , which then fuels the reality of one’s life. I think doing this has helped me a lot on this journey. Allow me to give you a preview (don’t judge! hahaha):
blog32Because I remind myself of what’s written on this notebook every single night, I was able to get myself out of a less than ideal situation. Because I wrote down what I truly want, my standards for the kind of treatment by others I will accept  became crystal clear to me. It became easier to stick to what I genuinely want and to do away with things that don’t serve that purpose.

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Next time I will share another entry from my old journal that is a testament of the truth of what I am advocating here. (mejo out of place lang sya ngayon dito haha)

That is all for today!

I hope you get something from my blog entry. 🙂 Have a fun and fulfilling weekend! 🙂

Gracefully

5 Mar

“There’s a trick to a graceful exit. It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, or a relationship is over – and then to let go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its value.” – Ellen Goodman

Recently Updated7I’ve always had trouble letting go gracefully. This is because when I love, I love hard. I give it my all before I decide to retreat. I exhaust everything that I have until there is no more I could give, and this usually makes letting go so much harder because it feels like I’ve given up so much of myself for a love that was, after all, not meant to be…

P_20160214_082635_BFSabrina-cut beige top handed down by Tita Baby, loose brown pants from Landmark, brown bag gifted by Tita Lorna

I realized the past two weeks that this is a wrong and unwise way of loving. Heck, it is not what love is supposed to be. By doing too much, we open up ourselves to unnecessary hurt. But love should not make us suffer. Love shouldn’t feel contrived. It shouldn’t feel forced. It shouldn’t require too much energy. In the end, I realized that love is only true when it comes naturally to both parties, at the same right time.

Recently Updated6Necklace and bracelet from Landmark, watch gifted by my mom.

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This is the outfit I wore last Valentines Day – an outfit that made me trip 5 times while touring Intramuros, which he found too cute. lol. While my love story with the guy I was with last Valentines Day ended in a very magulo way shortly after, this nude number, I must say, will always remind me of that moment when February 14 finally felt so special. I’ve always longed for that year when Valentines Day would mean something to me. Never was I treated so well and dearly before but because of him, I got to experience being a princess on this day. He took very good care of me and made the day all about me – just the way I’ve always dreamed it should be. he has impressed the seven year old in me who was enamored by fairy tales and hopeless romantic movies.

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While what we have did not last for very long, I know that there was a reason  God sent me him. Maybe, aside from giving me the Valentines Day experience i’ve always longed for once and for all, it’s also so that I could cross out my Bucket List item number 3? 😛 haha

Recently Updated8

Someday, the love that I’m praying for will come. I know it will. Maybe, all the heartache and disappointment are just God’s way of preparing me for that big day. Maybe, He is teaching me to let go gracefully not for the benefit of others, but for the good of myself. He wants me to not self-destruct for love. He wants me to be sure of my love for myself before He gives me another person to take care of. Letting go is an act of kindness to ourselves. Doing it with ease means that we see how on our own we are enough.

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“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the things not meant for you.”

 I understand now. and I promise to deal with it better and to love myself even more every single time.

That is all for today, have a wonderful Saturday! 🙂

Renaissance Man

5 Jan

I walked into his pad at the 35th floor. I didn’t expect to be awed but the grand piano sitting so prominently at the front right side of the house welcomed me as I stepped through the door.

His house was corner to corner reflective of him:  grandiose, minimalist, freakishly clean, and quite intimidating. I personally think it was too big for a bachelor.  The house’s entire right wall was made of glass which allowed you to look down on the whole Metropolitan Manila. I bet anyone would feel privileged being there. I could tell he gets lonely a lot though. I felt it in his house. The fantasticness of it only lasts a few days. After a while, it just eats you up  – and you find yourself waking up to a hollow and quiet space. I wouldn’t wanna be there without him. The place would only light up with his presence: regardless of whether he was there being the boss that he’s always been, or when he’s being the musician that didn’t care about the worries of the world, or when he would totally let his guard down and transform into(finally)  a human being in front of me.

The man’s a billionaire. He drove a BMW, owned a multi-national company which had acquired multiple companies in the music industry, and had a massive factory overseas. Heck he had one community in a faraway province of China named after him. He was once called a renaissance man by one of his peers. Not sure if that person was telling the truth or just kissing ass but either way it was very revealing of who this so-called renaissance man really was. My jaw had dropped countless times with every new discovery.

He was the most eccentric person I’ve ever met in my entire life. He wore the same all-black casual clothes all the time, ate literally the same organic breakfast everyday,he was very health conscious, tyrannical and unpopular (at least to those he had fired), extremely organized, unforgiving with his time (he works literally 24/7 a day), and had an unfathomably beautiful blue eyes.

Ah. those blue eyes.

He was very handsome. Blonde hair and all. He’s tall and fit. He’s annoyingly neat. He had a very arresting smile — or maybe it was just so because a smile from him was rare. His mind never left his office even though he was in a coffee shop eating a cookie and drinking a cup of latte on a lovely Saturday afternoon… with me. He was most of the time serious and scary. But I liked it. And I liked that all these notwithstanding, he was  kind, respectful and patient with me.

There were times when I thought he was starting to care for me. There were times when he’d let me take a glimpse of his soul – the him that doesn’t need to portray constant strength, power and composure. I’d feel special for experiencing this. I bet only a select few could get this close to him. And then he started asking how I was doing more often. and because of this, I’d miss him often too.

He was merely a friend until that point where I decided I wanted him so badly. Unfortunately, he didn’t have time for a fancy dinner with me. And more unfortunately, I was done settling for coffee.

The end.

I Promise

8 Aug

You have to forgive me for not updating this blog regularly. It’s hard to juggle work, school and blogging all at the same time. I’m trying though and I hope you all understand 🙂

Today I’m gonna share some pictures from our quick trip to the “most beautiful Starbucks in the Philippines”, or so an online article says. Sometimes, online reviews of restaurants/ coffee shops can be biased. lol. Don’t get me wrong this Starbucks at Twin Lakes,Tagaytay is “beautiful” yes, but “most” is kind of arguable hehe. Nonetheless, the place was romantic enough for me especially come sunset. And the Tagaytay air was very cold, but not too cold. It was just perfect. 🙂

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11695808_1676986589203462_3798912977539405179_n A lot of spots in Tagaytay I consider as a piece of paradise: a place of timeless harmony, of peace, of comfort, and of meaningful pleasure. In places such as this, time slows down. Ironically, I deliberately look for this kind of place only to be lured by it to look within me.

11796460_1676986725870115_1385436953666822191_n A Thomas Merton once said that if we seek paradise outside ourselves, we cannot have paradise in our hearts. As much as I want to rebel over the idea, i do get his point. Perhaps it just depends on what paradise is for each of us, not in its literal meaning but in a much deeper sense. While there is nothing wrong in researching nice places to visit, we must take caution in revering anything in this world too much to the point that our happiness depends on that and that alone.

SbForever 21 cropped lace top, shorts from Baclaran, earrings from Divisoria, Parisian shoes, Kate Spade bag

911745378_1676986759203445_8072542920747621061_nI’m breaking off my chains. I have the tendency to chase and to keep an obviously worn-out relationship going because I’ve always equated the men I love/like as my paradise. It feels like losing them means losing my perfect harmony, peace and pleasure. But this time, I’ll try not to be afraid of being alone anymore. Sb111701152_1676986552536799_7724195597280379235_n  A few weeks back, I wrote  about the Sweetness of Being Alone. While I was writing that entry, I was merely thinking of the sweetness there is in occasionally  spending recreational time without company. However, it seems wiser to broaden the context of that title and apply it to a facet of my life that sometimes blinds me and stops me from finding the paradise within.

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11267666_1676986372536817_153407511117401787_n  “There’s so much more to life than finding someone who will want you, or being sad over someone who doesn’t. There’s a lot of wonderful time to be spent discovering yourself without hoping someone will fall in love with you along the way, and it doesn’t need to be painful or empty. You need to fill yourself up with love. Not anyone else. Become a whole being on your own. Go on adventures, fall asleep in the woods with friends, wander around the city at night, sit in a coffee shop on your own, write on bathroom stalls, leave notes in library books, dress up for yourself, give to others, smile a lot. Do all things with love, but don’t romanticize love like you can’t survive without it. Live for yourself and be happy on your own. It isn’t any less beautiful, I promise.”   – Emery Allen

11707571_1676986072536847_6709385228033358686_nSb2 So, I think I’m gonna spend the few months ahead learning to fully appreciate my being single and available in the meantime. And I PROMISE IT’S GONNA BE GREAT!!!

11221585_1676986005870187_840277569386187406_nThat’s it for today! 🙂 I hope you’re having a wonderful Saturday! 🙂